The Art Of
Apologizing Effectively: 5 essential elements
A lot of us have problem making a sincere apology,
however, the art of apologizing effectively is as easy as
ABC.
Though it has to be done the right way.
There are various ways to screw up an apology
and you can avoid all of them with these 5 essential
apology elements.
How to apologize to your boyfriend or girlfriend that
will really be considered?
1. Showing regret
Put the regrets first. For you to even think of
apologizing, you should be convinced within yourself that you are wrong and
understand that you hurt this person.
Avoid starting with phrases such as: ‘I will like to
explain my point of view’
or ‘first, tell me what I did wrong’.
Using effective phrases to start your apology is
important and examples are:
‘Please forgive me’ or ‘Let me start by apologizing’.
Approaching the person with regret will help show your
sincerely understand you did wrong
and feel bad about it. This gives you a start point for
your conversation.
However, do not include ‘ifs’ and ‘buts’ in your apology
because these show you are not really sorry, but just trying to bury the
hatchet. For example: ‘I’m sorry if I hurt you’ or
‘I never meant to make you unhappy, but you get me angry
at times’ or ‘I’m sorry you feel this way’.
2. Setting the
ground
Here are some important factors to note:
Make the first move: Nobody said it would be easy to
apologize,
but what could be more difficult than admitting within
you that you are wrong?
Once you understand that you are guilty you need to take
the bold step of initiating the apology.
Right timing:
This is one important fact that can influence the apology as a whole.
Look for
a time that will be convenient for them, as it will not be favorable to get a
divided attention.
Better to do it in
person: A personal apology is the most effective
because you have the chance to physically express your
remorse.
It is even better to do it in private, rather than on
phone, text message, or on social networks.
Well, it is normal to have certain circumstances that won’t
permit a face-to-face approach.
For instance when you are several miles away. So, there
are other ways to do this.
I used one unique service that allows you to say whatever
you want
as if you were saying sorry to your boyfriend in real
life.
It is called Minute of Life (http://minuteoflife.com/) on which you can create
a photo
slideshow and video messages. Try it and you will see how it works
magic.
Plan what to say: Of course, this should not be like
reciting a how to say sorry
to your boyfriend article. It is a way to make sure that
you do not deviate from the plan.
Make a list of things you are sorry for, things you
regret, how you plan to change, and so on.
3. Accepting
responsibility
This is one way to make sure you don’t blow the alarm
even before your apology has been accepted. Show that you are guilty and accept
full responsibility for everything that went wrong.
Actually, in most cases, the other party is also guilty
in some ways,
but you shouldn’t mention this when apologizing. They
will voluntarily apologize to you later.
Avoid saying things like: ‘Actually, you also were
wrong’.
4. Restitution
move
Thought it would be satisfactory for some people,
but it is not enough just to show you are sorry and
accepting responsibility.
Show you are willing to change and will not allow such to
happen again.
And preferably add a plan to make up for the hurt you
might have caused.
5. Show respect
and understanding
It is normal for the person not to give a response
immediately,
so you have to show that you understand if they need time
to think about it.
This actually depends on how serious the offence was;
these steps have been proven to get immediate and
positive result for a lot of people.
I hope you found my article useful and I will be glad to
read your response on how it helped you.
Feel free to leave a line or two in
the comment box.
http://howtoapologize.org/art-apologizing-effectively-5-essential-elements/
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