Knapweed
Sorry, but EQ Is Way More Important Than IQ These Days
Royale Scuderi
Many experts now believe that
a person’s emotional intelligence quotient (EQ)
may be more important than their IQ and is
certainly a better predictor of success,
quality of relationships, and
overall happiness.
It’s interesting to note how
the concept of emotional intelligence has evolved over the years,
from its inception as
something called “social intelligence” all the way back in the 1930’s,
to “emotional strength” in
the mid-20th century,
to its current terminology,
“emotional intelligence.”
Emotional intelligence (EI)
is, in layman’s terms, our level of ability to:
Recognize and understand our
emotions and reactions (self-awareness)
Manage, control, and adapt
our emotions, mood, reactions, and responses (self-management)
Harness our emotions to
motivate ourselves to take appropriate action, commit, follow-through,
and work toward the achievement of our
goals (motivation)
Discern the feelings of
others, understand their emotions, and utilize that understanding
to relate to others more
effectively (empathy)
Build relationships, relate
to others in social situations, lead, negotiate conflict,
and work as part of a team (social
skills)
Emotional
intelligence is essential to building a balanced-life.
If you think emotional
intelligence is only important for those who
always have to interact or
communicate with people, think it again.
Emotional intelligence is a gateway to a balanced-life. It’s
essential to basically every aspect of life.
Physical Health – The ability to take care of our bodies and
especially to manage our stress,
which has an incredible
impact on our overall wellness, is heavily tied to our emotional intelligence. Only by being aware of our emotional state and our reactions to stress in our
lives
can we hope to manage
stress and maintain good health.
Mental Well-Being – Emotional intelligence affects our
attitude and outlook on life.
It can also help to alleviate
anxiety and avoid depression and mood swings. A high level of emotional
intelligence directly correlates to a positive attitude and happier
outlook on life.
Relationships – By better understanding and managing our
emotions,
we are better able to
communicate our feelings in a more constructive way. We are also better able to
understand and relate to those with whom we are in relationships. Understanding
the needs, feelings, and responses of those we care about leads to stronger and
more fulfilling relationships.
Conflict Resolution – When we can discern people’s emotions
and empathize
with their perspective, it’s
much easier to resolve conflicts or possibly avoid them before they start. We
are also better at negotiation due to the very nature of our ability to
understand the needs
and desires of others. It’s
easier to give people what they want if we can perceive what it is.
Success – Higher emotional intelligence helps us to be
stronger internal motivators,
which can reduce
procrastination, increase self-confidence, and improve our ability to focus
on a goal. It also allows us
to create better networks of support, overcome setbacks,
and persevere with a more
resilient outlook.
Our ability to delay gratification and see the
long-term directly affects our ability to succeed.
Leadership – The ability to understand what motivates others,
relate in a positive manner,
and to build stronger bonds
with others in the workplace inevitably makes those
with higher emotional
intelligence better leaders. An effective leader can recognize
what the needs of his people
are, so that those needs can be met in a way that encourages
higher performance and workplace
satisfaction. An emotionally savvy and intelligent leader
is also able to build stronger
teams by strategically utilizing the emotional diversity
of their team members to
benefit the team as a whole.
Emotional intelligence is
still not completely understood, but what we do know is that emotions play a
very critical role in the overall quality of our personal and professional
lives,
more critical even than our
actual measure of brain intelligence. While tools and technology
can help us to learn and
master information, nothing can replace our ability to learn, manage,
and master our emotions and
the emotions of those around us.
Emotional
intelligence is not something inborn; there are ways to take control
of your emotions.
It’s never too late to learn
anything, so no matter how old you are,
you can still take up EI and
make the rest of your life better and happier.
1. Observe your feelings.
We easily lose touch with our
emotions when we’re too busy worrying about what to do next
and what can be done better.
Instead of really taking good care of our emotions,
we choose to ignore them most
of the time.
What we don’t realize is that
suppressing our emotions only makes things worse.
The more we try to put our
emotions behind, the more uncontrollable our emotions become.
When we have an emotional
reaction to something,
it can be due to the fact
that we’re having some unsolved issues. So next time when you feel like having
some negative emotions, calm down and think about why you’re experiencing this.
Take a deep breath and write
down the emotions you’re experiencing and the possible reasons.
When you have things written
down,
you can identify your
emotions triggers and think of ways to deal with each of them.
2. Practice responding, not reacting.
Reacting is an unconscious
process where we behave in an unconscious way
that expresses or relieves an
emotion. Responding is a conscious process that involves
paying attention to your
feelings and deciding how to behave.
When you’re more aware of
your emotional triggers,
you can always think about
the way to behave in advance.
For example, if you know that
you get angry easily and throw temper to colleagues
when you’re feeling very
stressful at work, take note of that and think about what you can do next time
when you’re experiencing the same trigger. Maybe you can try to tell your
colleagues
that you need some silent
moments because you’re feeling stressful at the moment,
or maybe you can get a few
minutes of alone time just to calm down yourself first.
3. Stay humble all the times.
When you always believe that
you’re better than others, you’ll not see your own faults,
and you’ll likely to get
emotional about things that don’t meet your expectation.
Try to look at the same thing
from a different perspective. Instead of judging someone
or something, put yourself in
someone else’s shoes and try to think or feel like them:
would you do or feel the same
too and why? In this way, you’re likely to understand
other people’s thoughts and
emotions more; and you’ll probably learn something new
about how to deal with stuff
in similar situations too.
Be humble enough to know
you’re not better than anyone,
and wise enough to know that
you’re different from the rest!
Emotional intelligence can be
learned, it’s a lifetime process.
It’s never too late to learn anything;
it just takes continuous observation and practice.
So no matter how old you are,
y
ou can still take up EI and
make the rest of your life better and happier.
References
|
Dr. Travis Bradberry: Emotional
Intelligence Statistic
|
http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/emotional-intelligence-why-important.html
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