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Saturday, 26 September 2015

10 Things Your Older Sister Never Told You

A blind barrow.

10 Things Your Older Sister Never Told You
BY Ivan Dimitrijevic

When you are the younger child in a family you have to listen not only to your parents,
but to older siblings as well. A younger sister will often complain about being treated like a baby,
or being bossed around by her much older sister when they were younger,
but it’s not all sunshine and rainbows for big sis either.
There are a bunch of things that your older sister never really complained about or feel the need
to tell you about, knowing that you will come to understand such things when you get older.

1. She spent years as a single child and lived under stricter rules
When your parents had her they didn’t really know what they were doing
and they felt incredibly protective, so your sister ended up living under very strict rules.
By the time you came along, they had already learned to be a bit more lenient. Your sister essentially paved the way for you, and there were times when she wished you appreciated that fact a bit more.

2. She was put up to higher standards because she was the older one
Not only did she have to take the full brunt of your parents’ attention before you came along,
but she was actually held accountable later on, because she was the older one
who needs to know better. (M’reen. Oh boy! Do I remember than one.) She’d take a bullet for you from time to time, and while it was frustrating it helped her become a more mature
and responsible person, and having a successful older sibling can be beneficial for you as well.

3. More often than not, she’d find herself trying to be a good role model
Since your older sister was forced to act a lot more mature than other kids her age,
she’d end up thinking about her choices and actions, because she knew full well
that you looked up to her. Although she might have wanted to be a bit irresponsible and have fun,
at times she had to use self-control and try to set a good example.

4. She made things easier for you by giving you her hard-earned bits of wisdom
When she went through rough times, got in fights with mom and dad, had trouble in school – 
she had to figure it all out for herself. She had to take a few hard falls in order to get back up stronger, but she was more than happy to give you all the little tips, tricks and gems of wisdom
that she learned the hard way. The advice might have seemed as nagging at times,
but she just didn’t want you to go through all the troubled that she did.  

5. She knew you’d have to make some of the same mistakes, but couldn’t talk you out of it
While she did her best to give you some pointers and guidelines, some things you just have to experience for yourself to truly appreciate. There were times when she watched you make mistakes, and she knew that you wouldn’t listen, but she was still there to comfort you afterwards.

6. She also gave your parents tips and helped them deal with you
Of course, it is inevitable to have a few stern talks with your parents and get punished,
but what you didn’t appreciate when you were younger was the fact that your older sister
gave parents some insight into how you felt and helped them find the best way to approach you
in that situation. She took up the role of mediator when it was necessary, and even sided with you when you were clearly in the wrong.

7. It both excited and frightened her when you became old enough to start dating
When you have a much older sister you are always the baby in the family, but as you grow older there comes a point where you can speak to each other as friends as well. It’s usually about the time you start dating. She gives you tips on how to deal with the confusing mess that is the teenage girl’s psyche, and you can also learn some useful tips on makeup and what to expect from boys.
Talking with your parents about sex is a weird experience, but your older sister can provide
some much-needed guidance without you feel too uncomfortable.
On one hand your sister was glad that she will be able to share such things with you,
but on the other hand she was worried that you might get your heart broken.

8. When she critiqued you or teased you, it was so that you would become a better person
Sometimes your older sister would seem mean, like she didn’t care about your problems
or like she just wanted to tease you for the fun of it. However, a lot of the time it was used
as a means of motivating you to do better or to toughen up – wanting to prove someone wrong
or “show them” is the best source of motivation. If things go a little too far, it’s easy to make
a sincere apology and make up, so this tough love tends to become a common strategy.

9. She had to act as teacher, caretaker and bodyguard,
and she didn’t always know what she was doing
An older sister will stand up for you, help you out with bullies, feed you, help you out
with homework and teach you valuable skills. The thing is, she didn’t receive any formal training
and she didn’t really know what she was doing a lot of the time. However, that didn’t stop her
from trying her best to keep you safe and help you out with anything you needed. An older sister’s boyfriend is also a great influence and can have “the talk” with your new boyfriend.

10. She knew that she’d be the first one you call in an emergency and was ready for anything
An older sister has to be ready for literally anything. Driving you home wasted from a party,
helping you sober up and cleaning up the mess so the parents don’t find out? Check.
Taking you shopping? Check. Borrowing you cash so you can go to a concert you’ve been waiting for? Check. Your sister used to get into all kinds of trouble herself and understand that
she has to be ready to help you out with similar problems, and perhaps even some unique ones
that she never came across. It’s not a big surprise to her when you come to her in a panic,
but she will make sure that you know how big of a favor she is doing for you.
These are just some of the things that a much older sister went through, but never really wanted
to mention. At the end of the day, she loves you like no one else in the whole world,
and while she did help make you into the person you are today, she is aware that you, in turn,
had a big positive effect on her life as well.

http://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/10-things-your-older-sister-never-told-you.html

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